You might have thought I've just been twiddling my thumbs this first 43 years of my life, but actually I've been collecting material for my novel, so nyah. I've been collecting material so long that now its stuffed into carrier bags, preventing my mental cupboards from closing neatly and tripping me up when I attempt a simple mental journey from A to B.
"So what's your name?" they ask me.
"Ah! Now! That's in here somewhere!" I reply. "Let me just move this pile of calorie information from the 1970's! (Only 235 in a Double Decker incidentally). Maybe under this factoid that a baby squirrel will bite you if you poke it.....did you realise incidentally that I know TWO people who are phobic about buttons? And this puzzles me"
God knows what's in there really. It's full up in my brain and I'm still no closer to writing the novel I've been trailing for the last 30 years.
As any would-be writer who never wrote a word will tell you, there is always one key task you must complete before committing pen to paper. The task might be to bring up the children, to read a book on awakening the creativity within, to gain insight, or in my case, declutter my brain. Then when my mind is as neat and empty as an Ikea interior, I will breathe in a deep healing breath, and breathe out some pure, beautiful and intelligible prose.
Dejunking my brain is a big job, because on average I have 4 brilliant ideas that should go in a book every week. Now then, (stick with the metaphor, its nearly over), this blog is my skip, right? Its where I'm going to chuck all my superfluous stuff. If I can chuck the brilliant ideas in as soon as I have them, how efficient that would be. I wouldn't have to use my existing storage trying to remember them.
No-one is saying that this will be fun for anyone trying to read the blog. Sorry. Still love ya tho. Stick with me through this difficult time.